Game of Fear
by Dragon Star Queen
Summary: Kids, they grow up so fast, and it's a scary thought sometimes. Juudai has his doubts about his ability to be a good father. Time!skipping. GX&5D crossover fic. JohanxJuudai.
1. Chapter 1

Every once and awhile Johan would notice Juudai become distant. His heart would grow cold and he'd push Johan to the side, only wanting to find comfort in Yubel. This used to hurt Johan, before he understood at least. Johan had threatened to leave multiple times, the argument with the duel spirit, ironically, the only thing that made him stay.

"How can you do this to me, Yubel?!" He yelled, his anger welling in his eyes in the form of tears. "You're taking him from me!"

"Johan." She started calmly. "I could never. You make Juudai eternally happy, and you know I could never destroy that happiness."

Johan looked behind her. Juudai was lying on the bed. His expression was blank, not even acknowledging his lovers arguing.

"Then why does he act like this?" His voice was pleading. "Why would he rather be with you?"

"He doesn't." She replied sadly. "Well Juudai doesn't, anyway."

"Then you are doing this to him!" He accused, pointing the finger of blame straight at her.

"No." She shook her head, remaining calm. "Well, not entirely."

His eyebrows knotted together. "What?"

She glanced at Juudai briefly, his stony expression ate at her heart, before turning her attention back to the bluenette. "You know Juudai is only one half of a complete heart, Haou being the other." Johan nodded his attention turning back to Juudai. Nothing Yubel told him was going to be news. Juudai rolled over, his back now facing the couple. "Even after all these years the bonds that hold it together are in fact fairly weak."

"But I thought Juudai gained control of Haou when he dueled you." This all wasn't making much sense to him. Yubel had only repeated well known facts to him.

"That's true." She confirmed. "But it's also true as soon as Juudai doubts himself Haou takes over." She reminded him.

Johan's attention snapped up to her. "What could he possibly doubt?" Yubel looked away, not wanting to reveal Juudai's secrets. "I know you know."

She nodded and sighed before looking back up at Johan. Juudai's secrets would always be safe with Johan. "He doubts his ability to be a good father."

Johan closed his eyes, his mind being flooded with pictures of his infant twins. "Why would he turn to you, we need to be able to trust each other as parents."

"Because." She paused looking for the right words. "He's Haou right now. And Haou will always choose me over you." She watched rejection consume the young man's face. "I'm sorry, Johan. Please understand."

His shoulders became tense, causing him to hunch over looking at the ground. "Yubel."

"Hm?"

"I need to talk to Juudai." He said quietly trying to disguise the hurt in his voice.

"Johan, I just told you that isn't Juudai."

"I know that." He sighed heavily before looking up at the spirit. His eyes were wet and glossy, but there were no tears. "But surely you can talk Haou into letting go of Juudai's conscience."

She nodded. Without saying a word she disappeared back into the depths of Juudai's mind.

Johan straightened himself and swallowed his fear. Juudai turned in the bed so he was once again facing Johan with closed eyes. Johan walked toward the bed and sat down next to him.

"Juudai." He began. He rain his thumb over Juudai's brow until his eyes fluttered open. His chocolate eyes were looking back at the bluenette instead of Haou's golden ones.

"Juudai!" Johan couldn't hide his relief that Yubel convinced Haou to let go.

The brunette smiled up at his husband. "Good to see you too, Johan."

Johan ran his fingers through Juudai's thick locks. _He doesn't remember his possessions_. "Juudai..." He looked away searching for the right words to say. Not that the answer was in the dirty laundry, anyways.

Juudai took Johan's hand from his hair and held it. He was worried the bluenette had only said his name to him. "What is it, Johan?"

Johan looked back at Juudai. "Yubel told me some things."

Juudai tensed up, squeezing Johan's hand. His eyes flickered gold for a moment before returning to their warm brown. Johan had betrayed Yubel's trust, causing her hold on Haou to slip.

"And you shouldn't doubt yourself." Johan spoke quickly, not thinking much as the words left his lips. Juudai was beginning to fall again; the stress etched deep into his face. "We're going to be the best parents, but I cannot do it alone."

Juudai's eyes grew big and vulnerable as he looked up at the bluenette. Tears filled them as his secrets came into the light. "I'm afraid I'll mess this up." Juudai confessed. The twins had become more aware of their surroundings. They'd coo, and roll over to get from place to place. Always curious, discovering new things about their world everyday. They had entered their most important stage in life. When nurture met nature head on. "I've screwed up a lot of lives, Johan, I can't screw this up." The tears began to course down his soft cheeks. A gold tinge sparked in his eyes. Johan gasped and wiped away the tears with his thumb.

"You won't." Johan promised, a reassuring smile on his face. "I'll be right there with you." He leaned down and rested his forehead on Juudai's, noses touching. He laced their fingers together. "And if you do, I'll still be right there to stop it." Johan stared intensely into Juudai's eyes. There was not a speck of gold.

Johan could see the smile in his eyes now.


	2. Chapter 2

_AN: I have decided that this story was going to involve a lot of time skipping. Instead of Juudai trying to get used to the idea of just new infant twins, it was going to be getting used to the trials childhood as a whole throws at the parents. Decisions they need to make that will ultimately change their children forever. I hope you enjoy this._

--

Johan sat in the plush arm chair. In front of him on the floor Juudai sat in between his legs, a large red fleece blanket stretched out across the floor. The twins were laying on their backs, head turned to face each other. They were both silent, intense hazel eyes carefully studying their mirror image.

Johan raked his fingers through Juudai's hair, loving the feeling of his silky locks slipping through his fingers. "Juudai?"

"Hm?" Juudai leaned forward. He placed each of his index fingers in their small hands, delicate fingers wrapping around his own instinctively. They never took their eyes off one another. "I love it when they do this."

A smile crept across Johan's face. "It is adorable, isn't it?" Juudai had begun to settle into his fatherly role quite smoothly. Johan had not seen a speck of gold in his eyes since that night a few months ago.

Ruka let go of Juudai's finger and stretched her arm out to touch her brother's chest. She smiled at him, causing him to smile back, before rolling over and began to crawl away from the blanket. Juudai went to get her, but Johan placed his hand on his shoulder to stop him.

Johan got off the chair to sit next to Juudai on the floor. He slipped one arm around Juudai's middle, half hugging the brunette. "She's fine." He said as he carefully watched her crawl away.

Ruka stopped alongside the coffee table. She grabbed the edge of the table to pull herself up. Juudai watched, worried she would loose her balance and come crashing down. Noticing this Johan leaned over, kissing him on the cheek, reminding him again that she was fine.

On the table sat Juudai's deck. Her small fingers reached for it, drawing the top card. It was a new card Pegasus had sent Juudai earlier in the week.

"Hi." She cooed, waving at the card. Juudai looked over at Johan, both of them sharing the same confused expression. Johan looked back at Ruka. Kuribon was floating around her as she tried to grab at it.

"Juudai, did you know that card had a spirit?" Johan questioned.

Juudai shook his head, too surprised for words. Kuribon began to float away from Ruka. Carefully she let go of the table trying to find her balance. With her arms outstretched she gingerly lifted her foot as she began to take her first steps.

Juudai looked over at Johan, wanting to take in his reaction. A smile spread across his face curling up to his ears. His eyes were glossed over in tears. Juudai knew Johan had always wished his children could see spirits. It was always something Johan held close to his heart. It was Ruby who brought him to Juudai in the first place, and his Gem Beasts who helped Juudai save him from Yubel's possession. Now he could be connected to his twins on a whole new level, too.

Ruka tripped over the edge of the blanket, falling on her hands and knees in front of her mirror. Kuribon passed over Rua, but he did not see her.

Well, at least one of his twins.


End file.
